Examining my Relationship with Money was a necessary step to overcoming the obstacles of yesterday and moving up to a higher level of success. When I was truly mindful, I realized that I had an ADVERSARIAL RELATIONSHIP with money. It was a mess! You know what I always say, that is, whatever you have on the outside matches what's on the inside. If you have an adversarial relationship with money on the inside, it's like pushing it away! No matter how hard you work, struggle and strive, if your attitude about money is wrong in your psyche, you're never going to get ahead financially. I had to dig deep and pull up the roots of negativity to figure out my true relationship with money. Once I became aware of wrong thinking patterns, I committed to improving my mindset to achieve greater freedom in my life.
Afraid of Money
It's true. I have always equated money with fear. Even when I've made in the high-six-figures, I lived a life in fight-or-flight panic mode worrying that it would go away or that I would make the wrong decisions. In leaner times, I've avoided my bank account for fear of what was not there. I've always hated looking at P&L Reports and nearly have a panic attack when my CPA calls.
Immature Beliefs About Money
I grew up with a single mom so money was always tight. Worries about not having enough money to survive made me insecure. This mindset followed me into adulthood. Instead of growing out of it, I simply brought my beliefs with me. So I tripped out over not having enough money or having too much... I either tried to spend it really quickly to get it off my hands or worried how to make ends-meet. Somehow I forgot that I'm now an adult and I'm capable of taking care of myself. I am a grown-up. I can handle whatever comes my way...
Lack Mentality
Fearfulness and worry about finances can be summed up as a "lack mentality." Instead of having good mental associations with money, I've had negative associations which does what? You guessed it...
When you dislike money you subconsciously push-it-away. Doh!
Like Attracts Like
It's true! Your conscious brain is the ruler of your subconscious. If you don't step in and take control of your thoughts and beliefs, your neurons go into default. If you associate fear, worry and panic with money--your subconscious will steer you far away from it. If you associate negative emotional states with money your subconscious will route you away from such pain. Yikes!!!
Be aware! Be mindful of your thoughts and your beliefs. False beliefs about money can hold you back and steal your increase.
What I needed to understand is the power my negative beliefs were having over my own financial success. That my lack was not due to my own failure, but actually the high-functioning of my own brain trying to keep me from the pain of fear, worry and panic. Thanks brain, but I'll take over from here!!!
You Are In Control
Each of us have a thinking brain, a conscious mind that sets the course for our lives. If we choose to be conscious and THINK and stand up and LEAD ourselves, then we can go wherever we want. So often we fail because we allow our subconscious--hidden desires--to lead us by default. It doesn't have to be this way. We have the power, you and me, to take the reigns over our lives and set-the-course by being mindful of our thoughts. We have the power to change our beliefs as we take action in the direction that we want to go.
So let's look at some of my backwards thoughts about money. Perhaps you're holding some of these thoughts too? If so, there is no time like the present to get comfortable with being as wealthy as we believe in our hearts we deserve to be... Sometimes it's necessary to look at what we WERE feeling and thinking relative to an issue we are facing. This is not to DWELL on negativity, but rather to uproot the hidden thinking patterns and mental scripts that need to be replaced with more life-serving, mature concepts that will take us where we want to go...
- I thought I was horrible with money.
- I thought I was terrible at math and money and math go together.
- I thought I could make money but didn't know what to do with it.
- I was afraid I didn't have enough money.
- I thought if I didn't have money I was worth less than rich people.
- I thought that money made me a valuable person.
- I thought that if I ran out of money, I would literally keel over and die.
- I thought I would be humiliated without money.
- I thought if I had money, I would lose it.
- I thought if I had money, it would change me into a person that I am not.
- I thought having money was shameful.
- I thought I wanted to not think about money because I didn't understand it.
The list could go on. It's good to consider all the thoughts you have about money and make sure you are neutral about it. It is not your source! Remove the negative emotional attachment. Replace your negative thoughts and beliefs about money with positive thoughts and beliefs. I'm not saying worship it, but I'm saying relax! Enjoy! Learn to use money as a tool to accomplish your lives dreams, goals and visions and to help you live up to your full potential, help others whatever you desire.
The Truth About Money
The truth about money is that it's not some magical formula to a happy life. Yes, many people who are very rich are still miserable. That's not the point. Money is a tool that can help you get to where you want to go. Without money, you can't go far at all. It is in your best interest to analyze how you feel about this mysterious green stuff, and vow to build a stronger, more positive connection.
Here are 2 truths I realized about money:
Money is a tool. Money is neither master nor monster. Money just is. It's neutral. My use of money is what determines its utility. My lack of money or abundance thereof is totally based on my own openness and comfort level. I control the dial. You control the dial. We control how much increase and wealth we will allow in our lives. We can have as much as we can believe for.
There is no shame in wealth. There is a stigma in society, even underneath all the materialism, that says, "You shouldn't be too rich because it's not fair." There is a cultural feeling of guilt and obligation when you're doing well as so many others are hurting. Perhaps in some way, you want to level the playing field by suffering with everyone else, but this shouldn't be so! We have to face the false beliefs we hold and stop feeling bad for doing well.
Money Affirmations
I am great with money. Money is a tool just like a garden hose. It is not my master or my monster. Money is a neutral object.
I am not defined by the amount of money I have now. I am not valued based on my net worth. Money is an object, I am a living, breathing, fabulous being. There is no comparison. I cannot be any more or less than what I am because as long as I breathe, I have incomparable worth.
Money is a tool. I welcome financial success into my life. I am grateful for the opportunity to manage my own money and invest my increase wisely.
I am open to prosperity, abundance, wealth and provision. I am prepared to receive my increase gratefully and with joy, peace and contentment in all situations.
I am at peace about money. I am at peace about financial increase. I am ready to receive the blessings of heaven. I am ready to be blessed so that I can be a blessing.
Would love to read your comments. Please take a moment to share your thoughts in the comment section below. I'd like to know what you think about money and what this article brought to your mind. Talk to ya soon!
dotJenna
April 24, 2013
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